T-minus 1 day

Some people feel guilty about their anxieties and regard them as a defect of faith but they are afflictions, not sins. Like all afflictions, they are, if we can so take them, our share in the passion of Christ. ~ C.S. Lewis

I don't know if I've ever known true "sharing in the passion of Christ" affliction. Not until now. Never like this. I don't want you to get the wrong idea. I am not worried out of my mind, or even troubled to the point of losing sleep. But anxious? Yes. We have heard stories of recent travelers being detained in the Israeli jail and released after two days, only to be deported back to their country. We have been told not to mention the West Bank, Bethlehem, Palestinians or missions to anyone at the Tel Aviv airport. I have had to rethink all the items I had planned to bring with me on the plane. I know as I get more anxious, my bible will be a source of comfort. But that same bible might cause problems with the Israeli interrogators. I have no idea what to expect. I have never done anything like this. Therefore, my mind has been jumping- leaping even. But these words by Lewis give me something to think about. Comfort even. God has a plan. He is good. That doesn't mean His plan won't be hard. Or painful. But it doesn't mean that it will either. It just means that I have the Creator of the universe watching over me, keeping me company in those moments of fear, frailty or doubt. I have seen Him work through my moms fears and doubts. I have seen Him work through financial shortcomings. I have seen Him work through last minute obstacles in getting my passport. I have seen Him work in incredibly personal ways, providing words of encouragement through friends, calming angst I hadn't shared with anyone! As I experience this "affliction" I am completely humbled and overjoyed at the prospect of watching and experiencing God bring peace. This morning the Mount Hermon Staff prayed for Austin and me. We were reminded of the power of Christ's healing and how deep it goes. I am praying for that healing in Bethlehem. That is such a big prayer. And I really don't know any other way to pray yet. I guess those prayers will come as we meet the people and get a glimpse of their life. All this to say... God is good. Real good. And I still can't believe He is sending me out. But He is. And with 1 day left, Here I go...